I’ll be honest, I grabbed Not About Golf: The Life Changing Joy of Playing The Game by Mike Berland expecting golf tips, but I found something way bigger. This book shatters old golf myths and uses the game as a metaphor for joy, friendship, and growing as a person—no golf skills required.
Key Takeaways
Mike Berland’s book uses golf as a way to teach joy, friendship, and personal growth, not just sports skills.
The book breaks old myths by showing golf as open and welcoming to everyone, no matter skill or background.
Readers learn to find happiness in small moments, build strong relationships, and enjoy life beyond competition.
Book Overview
Premise and Purpose
When I picked up Not About Golf: The Life Changing Joy of Playing The Game, I expected a book about golf swings and scorecards. Instead, I found something much more interesting.
The book uses golf as a way to talk about life, happiness, and how we connect with others. It’s not a manual for perfecting your putt. It’s a guide for finding joy, even if you’ve never held a club.
The author wants to break the old ideas about golf being only for experts or rich people.
He shows how golf can help anyone build friendships, learn patience, and enjoy small moments.
The book focuses on stories and lessons that work both on and off the course.
I felt like the author was talking to me, not at me. He made golf feel welcoming, not scary or exclusive.
Author’s Approach
Mike Berland doesn’t just talk about golf rules or stats. He shares real stories and lessons from people who found meaning in the game. I noticed he likes to keep things simple and fun, which made me want to keep reading.
The author uses a style that reminds me of a good coach—someone who cares about your progress and wants you to enjoy the journey.
He avoids strict systems and instead encourages readers to find their own path. I loved how he explained that understanding why something works is more important than just following steps. This approach made the book feel personal and honest.
Not About Golf: The Life Changing Joy of Playing The Game stands out because it’s about life, not just golf.
Key Themes
Breaking Golf Myths
I used to think golf was only for people with fancy clubs and country club memberships. Not About Golf: The Life Changing Joy of Playing The Game completely changed my mind. The book calls out the old ideas that golf is too hard, too slow, or just for the elite.
I found myself nodding along as the author shared stories of beginners, weekend players, and people who never thought they’d set foot on a course.
The book shows that golf isn’t about being perfect or rich.
Anyone can play, no matter their background or skill level.
The author makes golf feel open and friendly, not scary or exclusive.
I have to give props to Berland for making me see golf in a new light. He strips away the pressure and invites everyone to enjoy the game, even if you’ve never picked up a club. That’s a message I wish I’d heard years ago.
Community and Relationships
This part of the book hit me the hardest. I always thought golf was a solo sport, but Not About Golf: The Life Changing Joy of Playing The Game proves it’s really about people. The author shares stories where friendships grow on the course, and strangers become teammates.
I started to realize that the real magic happens between shots, during those quiet walks and honest talks.
I remember one story where a group of players faced a tough moment together. They didn’t just play golf—they worked through their problems, laughed, and learned to trust each other. That felt real to me.
The book’s focus on community lines up with what I’ve seen in other places, too:
People say that working together and reflecting as a group makes everything better.
Honest talks about tough topics help build trust.
Using kind words and including everyone keeps the group strong.
When people mess up, they talk it out and fix things together.
These lessons go way beyond golf. They remind me that building relationships takes effort, but it’s worth it. I started thinking about my own friendships and how I could be a better teammate, both on and off the course.
Joy Beyond Competition
I used to think winning was everything. This book made me question that. Not About Golf: The Life Changing Joy of Playing The Game isn’t about chasing trophies or bragging rights. It’s about finding happiness in the small moments—like a good shot, a shared laugh, or a peaceful morning outside.
The author tells stories where people find joy just by playing, not by winning.
He reminds us that golf can be fun, relaxing, and even silly.
The book encourages readers to let go of pressure and just enjoy the ride.
I couldn’t put it down because it made me feel lighter. I started to see that joy comes from being present, not from beating someone else. That’s a lesson I needed, and maybe you do too.
Life-Changing Joy
Memorable Stories
I have to give props to Berland for the way he shares stories. Some of them stuck with me long after I closed the book. One story about a shy teenager finding her voice on the course almost had me sobbing. Another tale about two rivals becoming friends over a tough round left me gasping. These moments felt real. I could see myself in their shoes, feeling nervous, then proud, then just plain happy.
Friendships that start with a handshake and end with laughter
Small wins that feel bigger than any trophy
Unexpected lessons from people you meet by chance
Transformative Insights
Reading this book late at night, I started to see golf—and life—a little differently. The author doesn’t just talk about hitting balls. He talks about showing up, being present, and letting go of perfection. I realized I put too much pressure on myself, both on the course and off. Sometimes, it’s okay to just play.
“Joy isn’t about winning. It’s about being there, together.”
That line hit me hard. I wrote it down and taped it to my desk.
Practical Takeaways
I finished the book with a new mindset. Here’s what I took away:
Say yes to new things, even if you feel nervous
Listen more when you’re with friends or teammates
Laugh off mistakes and keep moving
Find joy in the small stuff, not just the big wins
I couldn’t put it down because it made me want to live better, not just play better.
Writing Style
Tone and Accessibility
I’ll be honest, I read a lot of books that promise to be “for everyone,” but few actually pull it off. This one surprised me. Mike Berland writes like he’s talking to you on the back nine, not lecturing from a podium. The language stays simple and friendly. I never felt lost or talked down to.
Short chapters made it easy to keep going, even when I was tired.
No golf jargon overload—he explains things without making you feel clueless.
The stories feel like real conversations, not stiff lessons.
I found myself grinning at the way he pokes fun at golf’s reputation. He keeps things light, even when he’s sharing something deep. That made the book feel safe, like I could relax and just enjoy the ride.
“You don’t have to be good at golf to love it. You just have to show up.”
Engagement
Some books make me check my phone every five minutes. Not this one. I actually lost track of time. The mix of personal stories, humor, and honest advice kept me hooked. I felt like I was right there, walking the course, hearing these stories firsthand.
I laughed out loud at some of the awkward moments.
I paused to think about my own life after certain chapters.
The book invites you to reflect, not just read.
To be fair, a few chapters felt a bit repetitive, but the overall energy pulled me back in. I finished the last page feeling lighter, like I’d just had a great talk with a friend.
Who Should Read It
For Golfers
I’ll be honest, I started this book thinking I’d just get a few laughs about golf. I ended up feeling like I’d found a new way to look at the game. If you play golf—even just once in a while—this book will probably hit home. It’s not about lowering your handicap or fixing your swing. It’s about the joy you find on the course and the people you meet along the way.
You’ll see your own stories in these pages.
The book reminds you why you started playing in the first place.
It helps you let go of the pressure to be perfect.
I found myself nodding along, thinking about my own awkward first rounds and the friends I made by accident. If you love golf, you’ll find something here that feels true.
For Non-Golfers
I know what you’re thinking: “Why would I read a book about golf if I don’t play?” Trust me, I had the same thought. But this book isn’t really about golf. It’s about finding happiness, building real friendships, and learning to laugh at yourself.
You don’t need to know a single rule to enjoy these stories.
The lessons work for anyone who wants more connection and less stress.
The writing feels like a chat with a friend, not a lecture.
I have to give props to Berland for making me care about a sport I barely understood. If you want a book that leaves you smiling and thinking about your own life, this one’s worth a shot.
Strengths & Weaknesses
What Works Well
I’ll be honest, I read Not About Golf: The Life Changing Joy of Playing The Game late at night and found myself grinning more than I expected. The book shines when it comes to making golf feel welcoming. I never felt out of place, even though I barely know a birdie from a bogey. Here’s what stood out for me:
Relatable stories: I saw myself in the awkward moments and small victories.
Simple, friendly writing: The author talks like a buddy, not a coach.
Big life lessons: I picked up tips about friendship, patience, and letting go of perfection.
Short chapters: I could read a few pages before bed and still feel like I learned something.
Humor: The jokes and light moments kept things from getting too heavy.
I have to give props to Berland for making a book about golf feel like a book about life.
Limitations
To be fair, the book isn’t perfect. I noticed a few things that bugged me:
Some chapters felt a bit repetitive. I wanted a little more variety in the stories.
If you’re looking for technical golf tips, you won’t find them here.
A few lessons felt a bit obvious, like reminders I’ve heard before.
Sometimes, the focus on positivity made tough moments feel brushed aside.
I finished the book feeling lighter, but I wished for a deeper look at the hard stuff. Still, I’d rate it a solid 6/10 for anyone who wants a boost of joy and a fresh way to see both golf and life.
I finished Not About Golf: The Life Changing Joy of Playing The Game feeling lighter and more open to joy.
The book stands out for its honest look at friendship, happiness, and breaking old ideas.
I’d recommend it to anyone who wants a fresh, friendly read.
Dionysus Review Rating: 6/10
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Frequently Asked Questions
Is this book only for people who play golf?
Nope! I barely know the rules, but I still found the stories and life lessons super relatable. You don’t need to play to enjoy it.
Will I learn how to improve my golf game?
Not really. The book skips technical tips. It focuses on joy, connection, and personal growth. If you want swing advice, you’ll need another book.
Can I read this if I’m looking for inspiration outside of sports?
Absolutely! I found the lessons about friendship, patience, and happiness work for anyone. The book feels more like a guide to living well than a sports manual.
